Jack's First Easter

When you think about kids and Easter, you typically imagine egg decorating and hunting, gifts from the Easter bunny, chocolate and jelly beans. Well, given that Jack is still too young for all this, we decided to focus today on what Easter is really about.

We attended our church's 11 am Easter service this morning, and as usual, Jack distracted the church members around him, smiling and laughing and babbling to them all. I'm not kidding when I say this ... this kid LOVES church! He loves to listen to the voice of our pastor Bill, and he can't get enough of the music and choir. It's too cute. Our pastor tells us all the time that he loves to hear Jack babble and giggle during his sermons, and we hope he means it ... we secretly keep waiting for someone to gently "remind" us that there is a nursery service available for babies on Sundays. But for some reason, I honestly doubt this will ever happen, given the celebrity status Jack has adopted with our church family. :)

I mean, who could resist this face?!?!

Robert and I both admit to not attending church often enough, partly due to being out of town a lot and partly due to letting other things "get in the way" of it (which we always promise to change but don't always follow through). But every time we do go, Robert and I always talk about how much better we feel for having gone and how it's such a nice way to end the week. Well, today was no exception ...

Maybe it was the fact that our pastor talked about the feeling of needing to be rescued at times in our lives. As he spoke, I thought back to a time in my life nearly 11 months ago when I sat in a hospital bed after delivering a beautiful baby boy, and professionals were already telling me that was wasn't perfect. I remember feeling angry, sad, cheated, alone ... and, well, like I needed to be rescued. I also remember just wanting grab Jack and run off with him to an island where there were just mothers and their children with Down Syndrome, so we wouldn't feel so alone and so ... different. I felt a desperate need to fit in but also a desperate need to flee all at the same time.

But something our pastor also talked about this morning was resurrection. He didn't just talk about resurrection for the obvious reason (it's Easter, duh), but he spoke of how maybe when we feel like we need to be rescued, we might actually be seeking resurrection of some sort ... a rebirth, a new start, a fresh perspective, new found faith and empowerment, an everlasting love. While I listened, tears welled up in my eyes as I looked over at my husband holding my sweet Jack (who was smiling at a nice elderly lady behind us and making her laugh, yet again). I realized at this time that I did not need to be rescued that day last May when Jack was born. Instead, I actually realized that I had become resurrected in some way that day ... as a new mother, an everlasting advocate for a child, reborn as a person whose heart was more open to difference, change, and most importantly, more open to love. It's incredible how one moment can be the most frightening and the most wonderful moment of your life, all at the same time.

Flower cross

We hope that all of you had a wonderful Easter, filled with love and family, and that today you felt at peace, believing in whomever or whatever you believe in, be it God or simply the love of a child. Today, I found peace believing in both. It was certainly a wonderful first Easter for our Jack. Church, followed by brunch at Pops and Grandma's house with family and dear friends, then a nice nap (for us all). It was a day in which everything just seemed to fall into place ...